if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
