Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize
