I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
