how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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