i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
do nipples grow back?
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