I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
