Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
