I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
