Joe is yelling at the trees again.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
