You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
