If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
