I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
