i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
