When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
