I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
