Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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