On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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