I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
