Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Randomize
