i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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