About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
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