Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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