the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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