I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Randomize
