This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
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