yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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