let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
