why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
