is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I need to calm my uterus...
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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