if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Randomize
