If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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