He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
