just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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