I didn't shave. On purpose
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
