he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
