8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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