one might say we're banned from that church
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
