So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Randomize
