There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
