her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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