i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
