There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize