Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
