People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
