I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
