He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
