My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
