I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
