porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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