i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
How naked do you want me to be?
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
