Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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