WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
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