Will you blow on my dice?
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
